The relationships of today, or at least not all, are not necessarily based on true love and respect. However, the following love story has endured the test of time and left a mark in history. Fulfilment in love and marriage needs much more than just love or attraction.
A Licensed Professional Counselor and Certified Counseling Supervisor, and a National Certified Counselor, Andrea Mathews, admits:
“Being in love does not guarantee that a relationship will work. Relationships require also compatibility and relationship skills on the part of both parties. But the “in love” requirement is a must. Relationships are not easy for they bring us to the deepest parts of ourselves. Therefore, being in love must be an aspect of any healthy long-term commitment and being sure that it is love, therefore, is an intensely important first step.”
According to clinical psychologist Meredith Hansen, Psy.D, who specialises in couples:
“Healthy adult love exists when both partners are emotionally interdependent; meaning that both partners love one another, care for one another, desire physical closeness with one another, but respect each other enough to have their own identities as well.”
Loving relationship takes work and compromise, so to make love last, both individuals need to dedicate to it entirely.
A licensed marriage and family therapist in Arlington Heights,Mudita Rastogi suggests:
“Your interests, opinions, and experiences can change as you grow. But if you share the same core belief systems, you will have a platform from which to build a strong relationship.”
Remember to respect one another and give your partner the freedom they deserve:
“We are all multifaceted, complex creatures. Your partner will never be able to match all your needs and interests. It is OK to pursue some separate activities, either individually, or with friends, apart from your partner.”
In addition, Meredith Hansen, continues:
“Knowing what you both want out of life and working together to make those dreams a reality will strengthen the bond in your marriage. “
A psychologist who specializes in relationship issues,Mark E. Sharp, Ph.D., explains:
“Long lasting true love is when two people make a commitment to each other and choose to act in ways that sustain their feelings for each other and their connection to each other over time.”
The following is a story was an example of one such love that was going strong for over 70 years, and is one that will definitely melt your heart:
Preble Staver born on October 17, 1921 and Isabell Whitney, born on October 31 both studying in Philadelphia met on a blind date. Ever since day one, they knew there was something special between them.
During the Second World War, they both decided to sign up. Preble enlisted as a Marine and ended with a Bronze Star, Isabell chose to become a Navy nurse in Maryland. Soon after the end of the war, they were reunited and got married on February 15, 1946.
They were both dedicated to one another and were determined to cope with whatever life had in store for them. Preble got a job in a bank and they lived an ordinary life full of love and joy.
According to Laurie Staver Clinton, the eldest of their 5 children, who is now 63 her self, Preble was “a tall, outgoing man with a strong, ‘larger than life’ personality” and her mum was described as“[her] heart” and someone who “taught [her] how to be a kind person, how to be a compassionate person.”
Sadly, during the last football game of his high school senior year In 1975, their son, Peter, died in an accident.
Laurie remembers:
“At that point, we began to really see a softer side of my dad. Parents aren’t supposed to bury their kids and that really took a toll on my folks, but it also brought them together. Something like that can either tear a couple apart, but they made a pact to get through it together. They really were each other’s support team.”
As life kept going, Laurie mum started showing dementia signs.
This unfortunate situation made them move into a long-term care facility in Norfolk, Virginia. Those moments, as Laurie remembers, were difficult for them, especially for Preble, who had no choice but to watch his loved one drift deeper into the disease. They lived together but slept in separate rooms.
Laurie continues:
“They just found another way to express their love. Dad, even after he stopped walking and was in a wheelchair, he would wheel himself down to the Memory Care Unit and go visit mom. When I would reunite them, they always, the first thing they’d do was put their hands out and hold each other’s hand and tell each other they loved each other.”
Preble had one last wish on his 96th birthday, to have one more nap with his beautiful wife.
With the help of the staff of the facility, his wish was made true and the couple had three hours nap, in order to enjoy their true love once more, layin one beside the other.
“There was not a single word spoken between the two of them. They held hands and just fell asleep.”
A few days later, on October 25, 2017, Isabell passed away, and Preble was there to say his goodbyes. Sadly, only 14 hours after the death of his wife, Preble died too.
This was the end of their incredible love that lasted for 7 decades. Yet, their love left an extraordinary mark in the lives of all people around them.
Laurie said:
“Mom and dad really lived out that, if you make a commitment, and even though life gets rough or life gets in the way, you work through life. And you live your life together.”
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